I do not know what is worse about this new Clash of Titans, the laziness in them not studying Greek mythology, or the laziness in keeping things relevant to the time period or mythos. Actually I know exactly what it is, it’s the absolute waste of Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes, whose talents and characters was the only shining light in a dark movie of shallow characters, shoddy CGI and light speed pacing.
It seems that people have forgotten the Greek mythology whose influence has made many a movie and tale as lovable as the original Clash of The Titans. Call me a nerd for being a tad too much into this but my annoyance started when the movie begins with a conveniently hacked up and incorrect story version of the Gods’ win over the Titans to rule earth. I do understand the abstract nature of this movie and the reality that this particular Perseus (Sam Worthington) was not the one of the ancient poems. But something about the matter-of-fact nature of the narration rubbed me the wrong way.
The armor and clothing is dark or black, there are no colors. The people or relevant armor that rang true of ancient Greece is not here. What we get instead is the X-Men treatment, black on everything and a mixture of armor and architecture of cultures that come about hundreds of years after the time of the Gods. Maybe Zeus wished in some steel from medieval Europe and haircuts from the modern day Armed Forces? He is all-powerful after-all, let’s say he did, just so I can shut up about it.
Aww screw it, I can’t ignore these things! Seeing Zeus (Liam Neeson) walk away from his throne in a type of mock plate mail armor, reminded me of his role as Gawain in Excalibur. Why was he dressed like a medieval knight in a movie about ancient Greece I wondered? This is not to say that the other Gods were much better off either, Apollo in golden standard was also in a form of scale mail and so was Poseidon (Danny Huston) who is replaced in relevance with the new owner of the Kraken, Hades (Ralph Fiennes). How does this make sense that an obvious water creature is owned by the king of the Underworld? Who cares right!?
Perseus, again in ancient Greece sporting a buzz cut reminiscent of a Marine or a Roman Legionnaire was only second in lack of relevance to him actually being played by Sam Worthington. Sorry folks, Jake Sully did not show up to play this time. Gone is the likeable kid from the original who grows in front of our eyes from a boy gifted by the gods to champion them, into a man who is bold and clever enough to take on the gorgon Medusa and topple the champion of Poseidon. No we get a Perseus who is simply not in the right time period, mindset or character to either be believable or formidable. When Io (Gemma Arterton) basically takes his hand and teaches him how to kill Medusa (Natalia Vodionova) it summed his character up very well. This is not the brave Perseus of the original, not by a long shot.
Ralph Fiennes as the bent and ultra dark Hades was a great character, his low, gritty voice and dramatic entrances made him extremely scary. The satyr-like Calibos (Jason Fleming) who chased Perseus and made his life hell in the original is reinvented in this as a jilted lover, whose body has been turned into some sort of demon, albeit not a satyr. Io is the replacement for the lovely goddess Athena, whose wit and metallic owl of the original were mainstays in our memory of its charm. Io is beautiful but she is no Athena, and thanks to the pacing which made this 2 hour movie seem like 30 minutes, you get no true feeling of familiarity with her or the other beauty in the movie, the princess Andromeda (Alexa Davalos).
I really wanted Clash of The Titans to be great, and based on the high votes I see on the web, it’s apparent that super fast pacing and lack of character development is positive right now. Maybe I am too old school and like to learn the personalities, histories etc. of my heroes but what can I say? For me the inaccuracies, pacing and shallow nature of this 2010 Clash of The Titans makes for a bad movie – which by the way is another to take full advantage of the 3D fad going on since Avatar. This makes me wonder about Sam Worthington and his range, or lack thereof, and why Liam Neeson thought that it was a good movie to be a part of. The trailers had me salivating, especially at the Kraken, yet upon seeing it at the end, I was already done with the movie.
Of all the characters and wasted talent, I must say that chief soldier Draco (Mads Mikkelsen) was my favorite. His portrayal of a grizzled, old wartime soldier was well done. Despite the pacing issues, we got enough of his character and history to go from hating him to respecting, then finally liking him.
If you own the original Clash of The Titans and you bemoan the campy, cheesy humor or the extremely dated special effects. You will find yourself forgetting its faults in lieu of its character; because for all the 3D effects, expensive CGI and acting talent, this 2010 version lacks character and I am sorry but no amount of 3D debris flying in my face can make that a good movie for me.
Written by Greg Dragon – who has written 364 reviews on Spicy Movie Dogs.
Cinephile and opinion writer, Greg Dragon has been a fan of movies since the 80's when Kung Fu theater was all the rage and Roger Moore was James Bond. As an opinion writer that has reviewed Box Office releases on a number of prominent websites, Greg is the founder and lead critic of Spicy Movie Dogs.
